Mar 3, 2012

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It takes me literately minutes to feel at home in a new place. I’ve been moving since I was a little kid – 3 years and 9 months to be precise. I don’t really remember anything from that time, but I’ve been told that I asked for my cousins and my aunts for a while after we moved. I can’t even imagine how hard it must have been for my mom to explain to me that we had moved to a completely different continent and that it would be years and years before I saw them again, especially considering that, that specific fact probably was breaking hear heart just thinking about it.

I guess when that’s your starting point all other moves will be easier. The biggest one so far being me packing my bag (no, not plural – I had literately just one bag!) and moving to a different country to study and the hardest one being having to move out of my apartment because I had rented it out while planning a trip to Tanzania only to find out I wasn’t going and I couldn’t get out of the contract with the new tenant. Yeah, that one sucked.

Now here I am, again planning a move. In less than a month I’ll be cursing over the fact that I have so much stuff and wanting to throw everything out while not really having the heart to throw out shoes I’ve bought but never used because I bought them when my feet were swollen and now can’t fit them anymore. I know the drill. It’s hard and frustrating and for a little while you feel like you’re neither here nor there, but then I get my stuff in to the new place and by the time I wake up the next day I can hardly remember I ever lived anywhere else.

I keep wondering if I’ll ever find a place where I can stay, if I’ll ever find that place where I want to stay and feel like I have everything I want right there. Right now I can’t imagine I ever will, my life isn’t turning out to be one of those where you can see twenty years in the future and see where you’re going to be, hell I can barely see one year into the future. I guess I’ll stay when I find a beautiful old house with a big garden that is located right in the center of a big city and is close to nature, my dream job, my family and my friends, but I’m not holding my breath that it’ll happen anytime soon. Especially seeing as both friends and family have a tendency to distribute themselves in several different countries…  

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